I’m working on a cruise ship, and I’ve found a very nice, very firm foam roller in the dressing room. Every morning, when I wake up and my boyfriend chooses to sleep and demands that I not make noise in the room, I soundlessly slip into my five-finger shoes and slip down to the dressing room two decks below. There I hold my secret lover – the foam roller. He knows just how to find the pain, and make it go away. I start by laying on him, and then we move through our positions like some therapeutic karma sutra. By the end of our secret session, he has made me tremble and nearly weep – there is one particular spot on my inner quad that he rolls from a certain angle that causes me to cry out.
My favorite spots to roll:
- Upper back.
- My hamstrings (I cross one leg over the other to get more pressure.)
- IT band
- My inner quads (this one makes it look like you’re humping the roller. Well, you ARE humping the roller if you’re doing it right.)
- Gluteal muscles (Sit on the roller with one crossed leg over the other, and roll your butt.)
Here’s a great video of these rolls -
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QJLxruO3su0.
In the meantime – I hope my boyfriend doesn’t catch us! Or anybody, for that matter – if anybody walks in during the inner quad roll, I will have a lot of explaining to do.
